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Steam Donkeys Gig to Focus on Job Creation

Local business leaders and various stakeholders in the honky tonk community are praising this Friday night’s performance by the Steam Donkeys at the Sportsmen’s Tavern as a probable “game changer” for the entire region.

Ordinarily, the show would have taken place last Saturday, which was the third Saturday of the month—the night the Steam Donkeys have held a longstanding gig at the revered country music mecca. However, an out of town act needed that night to round out a small tour, so the Steam Donkeys show was rescheduled for 9:30pm Friday (8/26).

“A number of people told me they were surprised we weren’t playing last Saturday,” said lead singer/songwriter Buck Quigley, “but we know what it’s like being on the road. Sometimes an extra gig can be the difference between buying just a pound of baloney, or buying two pounds of baloney with a loaf of bread. We didn’t mind giving up the night, and we hope our fans can come out this Friday instead. Because, frankly, we’re running out of baloney ourselves.”

For weeks, sources working behind the scenes have been speculating about the Steam Donkeys’ new plans for regional job growth.

“At rehearsal, me and the guys have been rolling up our sleeves and doing some heavy lifting on the unemployment issue. We discovered some interesting things. One, there aren’t a lot of jobs to go around. Two, most of the jobs out there suck. Three, a lot of the best jobs go to incompetent boobs who are related to people in power,” Quigley says.

“But that doesn’t mean we can’t change things,” he continues. “For example, I am proud of our accomplishments in the beer and cowboy boot sector. That part of our economy is really rebounding. To expand on that success, we hope to perform a new cover of an old Olivia Newton John song at the show.”

A noted local barfly, slurring on condition of anonymity, questioned Quigley’s claims. “Wha’ th’ fu’ sa livia Newton John’sa gonna do this…nis…niss?”

Quigley brushed off the criticism. “If we can make it sound like it did in rehearsal, covering an Olivia Newton John song will be an impactful move—as will our new cover of a song by the Clash. We should see an uptick in the Bourbon and taxicab indexes in very short order. But I’m not playing this gig to get into disputes about partisan politics. You might like Bud, your friend might like PBR. Labatt’s, Molson, Genesee, Red Stripe, Magic Hat, Flying Bison…it doesn’t matter. As Americans, and as western New Yorkers, we’re all lined up at the bar together, and we’re all thirsty.”

The Sportsmen’s Tavern also serves mixed drinks, and boasts a terrific kitchen.